Reading my old blog post about my present boyfriend brought up some old feelings. I never knew that we'd end up together. I thought he'll be just an asshole who'd make me hate guys forever.. but, no. He's the one who taught me a lot about being in a relationship--being loyal and stuff. (lol)
So, I was reading my old blog post (starting from June 2012) about him and how he betrayed me and how bitter I've become to how I "moved on" and to how I realized that I haven't really "moved on". The posts that I've written was heart breaking. Reading it again made me feel like it's happening to me all over again. The memories came back so vividly. How I cried myself to sleep. How I literally felt like my heart was being torn apart. The tachycardia that I felt.. They all came back.
I still remember the day I started having this "feeling" that he got back together with his ex-girlfriend and that's how it all started. He wasn't texting back, he was being distant. little did I know that he really got back with his ex already. HA. That was the worst feeling I have ever felt. I even swore to God I will never fall in love ever again (obviously, I broke that promise, lol)... But, what the hell. That's all in the past now, right? He changed already. I have 2years and 10 months of proof that he already have changed.
It still got me thinking, though. Is he really over his ex? I mean, he already told me that even thought his ex was his 4th girlfriend, she was his,like, first real girlfriend--and that's what scares me. What if she's his great love? What if one day she (his ex) decided to get back together with him (my bf) and he'd agree in a heart beat? GAAAAAAH. What am I even thinking.. Sorry, beb. SORRY :/ I know this will upset you. I know you hate it when I compare my self to your past girlfriends. I know you already said that our relationship is better and greater than any of the relationships you have had.. But, I still can't help thinking of the what if's.
"Baby, I'm never gonna leave you, say that you want to be with me, too."
Grabe~ sobrang natutuwa nanaman ako sa mga kanta na favorite ko dati. Alam niyo yung feeling na parang bumabalik yung pagkabata ko. hahaha. grabe, I feel so old na. 5 years ago, iniisip ko pag narating ko na yung age na to, may trabaho na ako, stable na ako. free na. EH HINDI EH. nagaaral pa. nagmemake up duty paaaaa. HUHUHUHUHU. pero okay lang. konti nalang naman eh! konti nalang, kasama ko si God dito. hindi Niya ako papabayan. <3 div="">
I love my boyfriend. I love my boyfriend. I love my boyfriend.
I don't know if it's just being together for 3 years but maybe that's it. Kasi parang hindi na kami ako(??) tulad ng dati. Para kasing tinatamad na ako makipagtext sa kanya. tapos yung sagot ko, maiikli pa. Hindi naman naman ganito dati eh. tintry ko naman magbago yun eh.
hindi naman ako nabobother dito dati. Nabother lang ako nung sinabi na ni J yun.
J: gusto mo hulaan ko future nyo ng bf mo? Me: pano? J: patingin ako ng texts nyo. Me: luh.. ayoko nga. hahahaha J: di ko babasahin. titignan ko lang. Me: *pinakita yung convo* J: Mas mahal ka nya. I'll give you.. mga 2 years pa. Me: bakit??? pano mo nasabi? J: ang haba ng mga text nya, tapos ikaw mga one liner lang or sobrang tipid ng sagot. Me: *medyo naoffend. hahahaha*
Pero come to think of it, parang ganun nga yung kinalabasan eh.
pero promise, i'm trying my best to change. To reply on time. hahahaha. tsaka mabilis na din kasi ako mainis sa kanya. ewan ko ba parang.... napaka competitive ko kasi. Pero I do really love him.
Imagine, dati lang makapag drama ako eh no? Napaka bitter ko pa sa kanya.. Tapos ngayon.. hihihi. Wala na. Okay na. Masaya na ako. Mahal ko sya.. AT! Mahal nya ako. Nako! AT most importantly wala na yung bruhilda nyang ex. :">
Hmm. Anyway, second birthday na nya sa April 20 na magkasama kami! 19th birthday nya. HUHU grabe. Mas matanda ako sa kanya! ng one year lang naman. :) Tapos sa 22, 7th month anniversary na namin. Excited na ako.
HIHIHIHI di ko alam kung ano ang ibo-blog ko. Basta masaya ako sa kanya. <3 p="">
22:>
So we're going on our FOURTH month this coming January 22, 2013. First month together this year. HIHIHIHIHI.
Sa totoo lang? sobrang masaya ako sa kanya. Sobrang in love na in love ata ako sa kanya. HAHAHA. as in hindi ko kaya na mawala sya, iniisip ko palang di ko na kaya. LOL, lahat naman ata nang nagmamahal ganun din yung naffeel. HEEHEE. Alam niyo yun, nung umuwi sya sa province nila nung Dec 22-Jan 1;, sobranhg hindi ako mapakali nun. Sobrang paranoid ako lagi. As in araw araw lagi ako nagaalala baka makita nya yung ex nyang bruha (HAHAHAHA bitch) magbago nanaman isip nya sakin. AT DOON! doon ko nakita kung gaano na kaliit yung trust ko. hahaha. bastos eh. Pinasok ko yung relasyon na to tapos di ko kaya magtiwala. hehe.
Kaso wala naman sa wala akong tiwala, natakot lang ako (para ngang walang tiwala lol ang gulo ko). Na-trauma na ako sa nangyari dati. haha. Natatkot. May takot parin. Apat na buwan na. HAHAHA. HAAAAY .
LORD, please?? Wag niyo po sya hayaang mawala sakin. Please.. sana po sya na talga. :)
Ang masasabi ko?! MASAYA AKO. Masaya ako sakanya. iba na yung ngayon kaysa dati. mas open na kami sa isa't isa. mas marami na kaming napag uusapan. BASTA mas maganda yung relasyon namin ngayon. :) hihihii.
pero ngayon, kinakabahan nanaman ako. Uuwi kasi sya sa probinsya sa 22 (on our 3rd month!!!!!). Kung nabasa nyo yung past posts ko, may issue ako sa probinsya nila. HAHAHA. natatakot ako :(
PERO LORD.. please oh. I want him. forever. :( Please, ilayo nyo po sya sa temptation. I want our relationship to last. Please... cineclaim ko na po!!! :) kami na forever:)
Reading my old blog post about my present boyfriend brought up some old feelings. I never knew that we'd end up together. I thought he'll be just an asshole who'd make me hate guys forever.. but, no. He's the one who taught me a lot about being in a relationship--being loyal and stuff. (lol)
So, I was reading my old blog post (starting from June 2012) about him and how he betrayed me and how bitter I've become to how I "moved on" and to how I realized that I haven't really "moved on". The posts that I've written was heart breaking. Reading it again made me feel like it's happening to me all over again. The memories came back so vividly. How I cried myself to sleep. How I literally felt like my heart was being torn apart. The tachycardia that I felt.. They all came back.
I still remember the day I started having this "feeling" that he got back together with his ex-girlfriend and that's how it all started. He wasn't texting back, he was being distant. little did I know that he really got back with his ex already. HA. That was the worst feeling I have ever felt. I even swore to God I will never fall in love ever again (obviously, I broke that promise, lol)... But, what the hell. That's all in the past now, right? He changed already. I have 2years and 10 months of proof that he already have changed.
It still got me thinking, though. Is he really over his ex? I mean, he already told me that even thought his ex was his 4th girlfriend, she was his,like, first real girlfriend--and that's what scares me. What if she's his great love? What if one day she (his ex) decided to get back together with him (my bf) and he'd agree in a heart beat? GAAAAAAH. What am I even thinking.. Sorry, beb. SORRY :/ I know this will upset you. I know you hate it when I compare my self to your past girlfriends. I know you already said that our relationship is better and greater than any of the relationships you have had.. But, I still can't help thinking of the what if's.
"Baby, I'm never gonna leave you, say that you want to be with me, too."
Grabe~ sobrang natutuwa nanaman ako sa mga kanta na favorite ko dati. Alam niyo yung feeling na parang bumabalik yung pagkabata ko. hahaha. grabe, I feel so old na. 5 years ago, iniisip ko pag narating ko na yung age na to, may trabaho na ako, stable na ako. free na. EH HINDI EH. nagaaral pa. nagmemake up duty paaaaa. HUHUHUHUHU. pero okay lang. konti nalang naman eh! konti nalang, kasama ko si God dito. hindi Niya ako papabayan. <3 div="">
I love my boyfriend. I love my boyfriend. I love my boyfriend.
I don't know if it's just being together for 3 years but maybe that's it. Kasi parang hindi na kami ako(??) tulad ng dati. Para kasing tinatamad na ako makipagtext sa kanya. tapos yung sagot ko, maiikli pa. Hindi naman naman ganito dati eh. tintry ko naman magbago yun eh.
hindi naman ako nabobother dito dati. Nabother lang ako nung sinabi na ni J yun.
J: gusto mo hulaan ko future nyo ng bf mo? Me: pano? J: patingin ako ng texts nyo. Me: luh.. ayoko nga. hahahaha J: di ko babasahin. titignan ko lang. Me: *pinakita yung convo* J: Mas mahal ka nya. I'll give you.. mga 2 years pa. Me: bakit??? pano mo nasabi? J: ang haba ng mga text nya, tapos ikaw mga one liner lang or sobrang tipid ng sagot. Me: *medyo naoffend. hahahaha*
Pero come to think of it, parang ganun nga yung kinalabasan eh.
pero promise, i'm trying my best to change. To reply on time. hahahaha. tsaka mabilis na din kasi ako mainis sa kanya. ewan ko ba parang.... napaka competitive ko kasi. Pero I do really love him.
Imagine, dati lang makapag drama ako eh no? Napaka bitter ko pa sa kanya.. Tapos ngayon.. hihihi. Wala na. Okay na. Masaya na ako. Mahal ko sya.. AT! Mahal nya ako. Nako! AT most importantly wala na yung bruhilda nyang ex. :">
Hmm. Anyway, second birthday na nya sa April 20 na magkasama kami! 19th birthday nya. HUHU grabe. Mas matanda ako sa kanya! ng one year lang naman. :) Tapos sa 22, 7th month anniversary na namin. Excited na ako.
HIHIHIHI di ko alam kung ano ang ibo-blog ko. Basta masaya ako sa kanya. <3 p="">
22:>
So we're going on our FOURTH month this coming January 22, 2013. First month together this year. HIHIHIHIHI.
Sa totoo lang? sobrang masaya ako sa kanya. Sobrang in love na in love ata ako sa kanya. HAHAHA. as in hindi ko kaya na mawala sya, iniisip ko palang di ko na kaya. LOL, lahat naman ata nang nagmamahal ganun din yung naffeel. HEEHEE. Alam niyo yun, nung umuwi sya sa province nila nung Dec 22-Jan 1;, sobranhg hindi ako mapakali nun. Sobrang paranoid ako lagi. As in araw araw lagi ako nagaalala baka makita nya yung ex nyang bruha (HAHAHAHA bitch) magbago nanaman isip nya sakin. AT DOON! doon ko nakita kung gaano na kaliit yung trust ko. hahaha. bastos eh. Pinasok ko yung relasyon na to tapos di ko kaya magtiwala. hehe.
Kaso wala naman sa wala akong tiwala, natakot lang ako (para ngang walang tiwala lol ang gulo ko). Na-trauma na ako sa nangyari dati. haha. Natatkot. May takot parin. Apat na buwan na. HAHAHA. HAAAAY .
LORD, please?? Wag niyo po sya hayaang mawala sakin. Please.. sana po sya na talga. :)
Ang masasabi ko?! MASAYA AKO. Masaya ako sakanya. iba na yung ngayon kaysa dati. mas open na kami sa isa't isa. mas marami na kaming napag uusapan. BASTA mas maganda yung relasyon namin ngayon. :) hihihii.
pero ngayon, kinakabahan nanaman ako. Uuwi kasi sya sa probinsya sa 22 (on our 3rd month!!!!!). Kung nabasa nyo yung past posts ko, may issue ako sa probinsya nila. HAHAHA. natatakot ako :(
PERO LORD.. please oh. I want him. forever. :( Please, ilayo nyo po sya sa temptation. I want our relationship to last. Please... cineclaim ko na po!!! :) kami na forever:)
steff 061393. Augustinian. Future PTRP. I blog my feelings out. I rant nothing but nonsense and it will probably bore you to death :p So, you can leave if you want. .
